let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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