i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
