I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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