I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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