We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
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