I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
