its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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