Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
