i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
