Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
