I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Randomize
