I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
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