its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
im calling her cock vulture from now on
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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