I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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