ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Randomize