are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
No stitches, just platelets and will power
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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