Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize
