I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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