How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
