doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Randomize