did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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