Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
