"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
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