my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Randomize
