I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
