loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize