she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize