I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Randomize
