Got a toothbrush?
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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