Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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