whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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