never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Randomize
