I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Randomize