I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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