yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
