Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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