Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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