I want to walk on stilts...naked
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
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