If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
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