Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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