I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
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