what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
