I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
