I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
