The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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