My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
All the doctor said was why
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
