But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
