she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
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