Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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