it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize